Changes
by DinoSteph
Summary: His voice dropped, along with his eyes. “but what about me. I'm losing two of the most important people in my life. Who's going to save me?” He crossed the room and sat at the table, almost sinking into the chair. E B R take off for Alaska. Jake wants in
1. Chapter 1

"Bella, you don't have to do this" Edward mumbled. I glanced over my stack of course outlines, my eyes tightening, forehead creasing as I tried my hardest to give him my most menacing look.

"Ooo, Scary." Edward joked.

I ignored him, focusing back on the pamphlet in my hand. I shuffled through school calenders. Chukchi, Fairbanks, Kodiak, Anchorage, Mantanuska, and Juneau. I grabbed the booklet from Juneau, which was located in the south east, mentally checking off the ones I found interesting. Anthropology, womens gender studies and economics.

"I'm just saying..." I slammed the book down on the table carefully not to break it, but with enough force to get his attention. I tore my eyes from the table towards his direction to find him sitting casually at the other end of the table. He hadn't moved an inch, one leg propped up on the other.

"You've been _'just saying'_ for the past month." I grumbled through clenched teeth. He put his hand up, pointing a finger towards the ceiling.

"We're only going there for a year."

"I..." He waved his finger, instructing me that he wasn't finished yet.

"Bella, Nessie is the only one who attracts everyone's attention. She's growing at a slower pace but we can't put in a school system here. Not with people we know."

I knew the facts. I knew why we had to leave and how long we were leaving for. The next couple of years involved a lot of moving around to avoid suspicions of Renesmees changes. I chewed on my bottom lip, a human trait that carried over.

"Bella, as much as you let me into your mind, I can't actually see what you don't want me to." He sighed out of frustration. I stared blankly, watching as he crossed his arms across his chest.

I knew he was right. Ever since I discovered that I could let him in, a part of me had also been keeping him out. Especially when it came to us leaving town. We had talked about me spending a year in school before my change and now that it's been over a year and a half since my change, he keeps telling me I don't have to go. I didn't want him to know why I felt the need to go to school. In his eyes we were equal, but I couldn't help but feel left behind.

"Mom! Look what I made!" I broke my train of thought only to see a blur as Renesmee threw herself into my arms.

"Oh." I said, clearly not surprised by the amount of strength my child held, but that I didn't see it coming. My thoughts seem to take up so much room now. "What did you make, sweetie." I asked, brushing her curls out of her round face.

In once hand she held a tiny wooden birdhouse made from popsicle sticks and the other hand outstretched towards my face. I took her small hand in mine, pressing it against my cheek. At once everything flashed through my thoughts. She started with the moment she left the house. She never wanted to leave anything out. I watched as Jake strapped her into her unnecessary car seat. The scenery flashed by as they made their way to Charlie's. She got out of the car, running up the stairs as Charlie wrapped his arms around her, in what he now calls his signature bear hug. I was happy to see how close that have gotten, and a little hurt that it was never like that between us. We all get second chances though and I knew Charlie was putting everything he had into building a strong relationship with his only granddaughter. I stopped noticing how close Jake always seemed to be, how big a part he played in all Renesmees stories. At first it bothered me how he was always hovering and now I was slowly understanding and accepting their complicated relationship which always seemed to change whenever Renesmee seemed fit. In the beginning he was like a brother because that's how she saw him. Now he was her friend. It seems to be an unspoken change, initiated by Nes. Jake will be there however she wants him. I watched as they walked into the kitchen, taking in the giant bag of popsicle sticks and carpenters glue. Renesmee sped through their arts and crafts time, laughing and enjoying herself as she creatively broke sticks in half to outline the windows.

I chuckled to myself when Renesmee made it a point to express just how she felt about lunch. Charlie was never a good cook but it warmed me that he was trying. She was still trying to get used to human food. She had her preferences though. Olives and Eggs. I figured she got her obsession with eggs from me, but the olives I'll never understand. The three of them watched some cartoons on the t.v, Renesmee snuggled in between. Everything faded to black very briefly and then I saw Alice. I watched as she sped through the rest of the day. Painting the birdhouse with Alice right beside her. I assume she was telling her which colors go well with other colors. I smiled when Renesmee shrugged her shoulders, painting the house an assortment of colors. She quickly sped through some more events, which finally brought her here to my lap.

"Well, it's absolutely beautiful." I gushed, holding the perfect birdhouse in my free hand. "It's better than anything I could ever make." I continued as I held up the house for Edward to see but he wasn't even looking. I followed his glare to Alice, who perched herself behind Jake against the door. I didn't appreciate their silent conversation but I knew it would come out eventually. Alice fixed her smiling eyes on mine.

"I think it's a great idea." She said.

"No one cares what you think, Alice." Edward mumbled.

"That's my cue!" Jake laughed as he crossed the room, placing a kiss on the top of Renesmee's head. "See you later kiddo" He said before he turned to leave. I watched the door close behind him and then back glanced back to my husband.

"Nes, why don't you go play for a bit, kay?" I said, smoothing her curls down as she slid off my lap.

I turned back to the table, glancing down at the crumpled pieces of paper in front of me. I peeked up, noticing both Edward and Alice were watching me.

"I have to go meet Jasper, he's taking me out for supper." Alice said quietly as she backed out the front door. His idea of taking Alice out for supper, was catching an elk for her.

I stared intently back at my paper, trying to avoid any more conflicting conversation.

"Bella." Edward whispered from across the table. "Please, tell me what this has to do with. Why are you suddenly interested in college?"

I folded my hands in my lap, playing with my wedding band. I was probably the most fidgeting vampire. I noticed that a lot of my human tendencies had stuck with me. In the matter of a second he was standing beside me, taking my hands into his as he pulled me off my chair. His warm brown eyes searching mine.

"It's not fair." I blurted out. "Why does she get to go to school? She probably already knows more than I do." I immediately felt like I was a 5 year old throwing a tantrum.

"What?" He laughed as he brought his hand to my cheek, making his way to my forehead, as if to smooth the creases. I sighed and took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to word what I was feeling.

"Edward, you have almost a century of knowledge. I have 19 years. I barely know two languages and you know more than I could count on my two hands. You've accepted me as your equal, but I'm not even close. I'm decades behind. Renesmee is technically not even two yet and she knows more than I do." I closed my eyes, realizing I still sounded like Renesmee was the older one. "I'm not saying I want to make a career for myself. I just want something more." I opened one eye to find his warm smile.

"Of course." Was all he said as he wrapped his arms around me.


	2. Chapter 2

"MOM!" Her voice shrilled loudly through the tiny cabin.

"I'm coming, I'm coming." I groaned as I finished folding the towels. You would think she would get bored of reading the same story every night. She had been reading for the past eight months, skipping the easy readers and began showing in interest in the classics. I quickly stacked the towels in the linen closet and made my way down the hall. I paused by mine and Edward's bedroom to find him hunched over a stack of paper.

"You know, your quite capable of reading our daughter a story too."

"True, but it's never the same when I do it. She prefers you to read to her." He said, shrugging his shoulders as he gave me a half smile.

I continued me way on to Renesmee's room to find her already tucked under the covers. I grabbed the tattered copy of Withering Height's which she claimed as her own the moment I started reading it to her. We had already gone through it three times, going on our forth. I scooted her over and took my place next to her, feeling her warmth touching my right side. I opened the book carefully so I wouldn't damage the binding and continued from where we left off last time. I didn't even get past the first two pages when she piped up.

"Mom?" I glanced down at her bright hopeful eyes.

"Hmm" I mumbled, setting the book in my lap.

"Tell me about how you and dad met" She asked quietly. The whole house grew quiet. I could hear that Edward had stopped writing, holding his breath waiting for me to answer. I stared down at our daughter. She had never asked this before. I quickly went through my muddy memories.

"Well..." I started as I wrapped my arm around her. "The first time I saw your father was on my first day at Forks High. He walked into the cafeteria with your aunts and uncles it was as if everything got quiet. I had never seen a more beautiful person before."

"Was it _love_ at first sight?" Renesmee giggled as I laughed along at her attempt to make the word love sound disgusting.

"No, no. At first I thought he hated me"

"Hated you?" She asked, eyes growing wide

"Yup. He left town for a couple days and then came back, gave me some excuse and introduced himself, and that's when it all started." I smiled, thinking back.

"Thats when the _looove _started?" She said, giggling. I wrapped my arm around her tighter, now she was just being silly.

"Not yet. At first it was a back and forth. One minute we could be friends, and then the next we couldn't. Your father was very complicated. Soon I discovered his secret and still decided that it didn't matter, that I loved him."

"I knew from the moment I saw her" I glanced up quickly to find Edward leading against the door frame.

"Oh, you did not." I laughed as he entered the room, sitting on the end of her bed.

"Well, Maybe not, but I did know something" He said, flashing a smile at us.

"Whats that?" Renesmee asked, leaning her head against my chest.

"I knew she was different, and special." He answered, nudging my foot with his hand.

"Only, because he couldn't read my mind, and wanted to kill me." I said, filling in what he left out, watching as he shrugged his shoulders.

"And then you got married, and had me, and happy ever after?" She asked, fighting off a yawn.

"Something like that." I said, staring at Edward. Renesmee really only knew what things had been like in this family since she was born. We never really talked about my life as a human with her, although I knew Charlie would tell her stories about when I was a little girl. I had always felt like my human life was something me and Edward would always share together, when I left him in. I never expected our daughter to ask questions about it. Foolish of me, she was getting to the age where everything was "what's this", and "why". I glanced down at Renesmee's sleeping face and leaned down, placing a kiss on her forehead. I silently slid off the bed, tucking the blankets around her tiny body.

Edward wrapped his hand around mine as we left her room, shutting the door behind us.

"I think one day, I'll tell her she has you all wrong." He laughed under his breath. We turned into our room, him taking his place at his desk, while I grabbed the basket of clean laundry and spilled it on the bed, starting with the pants.

"What do you mean?" I asked, sorting the clothes out.

"Well, the image she has of you is flawless. What she doesn't know is how clumsy you were, and the fact that you could hardly tell a lie. That trouble practically followed you everywhere." He laughed, putting his pen down and crossed the room.

"I don't know what your talking about." I said smugly, folding a pair of black slacks and placing them back in the basket.

"Liar." He said smoothly as he slid his arms around my waist, pressing his lips against the back of my neck. I twisted around his arms, staring into his light brown eyes. I quickly closed the space, pressing my lips against his. Everything had been so tense between us lately. I felt my body relax immediately as I ran my hands up his back and into their rightful place. I twisted my hand hands in his hair, pulling him closer. He squeezed my waist, lifting me up and backwards, laying my gently on the bed.

"Theclothes" I mumbled against his lips.

"I'll help fold them later" He said, sliding his hand behind my neck.

I glanced over at the clock, noticing it was almost 7. Renesmee would be awake soon. I shifted in Edwards arms, so that I was facing him.

"Morning." He said smiling. "Guess it's time for breakfast." He said, pushing himself off the bed. He walked into a giant closet and came out a second later wearing a pair of black sweatpants. I lazily got up, slipping into my robe and made my way to the kitchen to find Renesmee beat me to it. I wrinkled my nose at the aroma and pulled her into my lap as I sat down at the table.

"What are we going to do today?" She asked, kicking the leg of the table. I grabbed her leg with my hand as she strained against it

"We, are going help daddy pack." I immediately felt her leg give way, going limp. She held no interest in kicking the table, or in the topic of moving.

"Why can't Jake come?" She whispered as Edward placed her plate of eggs and toast in front of her. It always came back to Jake, or Charlie when we talked about moving.

I swiftly started playing with her curls. "Because, Sweetie, Jake has to go to school, he has to graduate." I had told her this numerous times but none of it mattered to her. "We can't just expect Jake to drop out and come with us" I laughed, trying to lighten her mood.

"Sure we can" She said quietly, as she poked her eggs with her fork. I looked up at Edward, his back turned to me as he cleaned the dishes he just used. I wish he would help me with topics like this. When she asked about Charlie coming with us he pulled out all the stops. 'Where would he live? With some vampires?' another favorite was 'what are we going to feed grandpa? Bear?'. Renesmee always came around when we talked about Charlie, she had accepted it and moved on. Jake was a resurfacing topic she was never going to drop.

I glanced towards the open window, hearing Jakes car coming up the road. There was a slight snap and I looked back at Edward, holding a broken plate in his hand, his expression hard.

"Edward?" I asked, shifting Renesmee off my lap into the chair and made me way across the room. His knuckles white as he gripped the plate. "What's wrong?" I whispered, sliding one hand up his back.

"Guess what!?" Jake's voice shook the house as he opened the front door. I watched as Renesmee turned quickly in her seat, sitting on her knees.

"WHAT?!!!" He voice shrilling, eyes widening.

"Look out Alaska! Here I come!" He said, a huge smile breaking across his face.

I glanced over at Edward, his eyes closed as he turned his back to Jacob.


	3. Chapter 3

"Nes, please hold still." I said, struggling with the zipper on her jacket. She was absolutely wired and jumping all over the place. "Tell everyone I said hi." I forced a smile and glanced up to Edward's impatient face, my back turned to Jacob who was sitting smugly at the kitchen table. I walked to the end of the walkway, holding Renesmee's tiny hand in mine. "You behave and don't give Grammy Esme a hard time." I was referring to the last time we were there and Renesmee decided it was alright to color in Esme's sketch book. I gave her a quick kiss on her forehead and handed her over to Edward, who picked her up swiftly in his arms. He was faster, and she got distracted easily, asking repeatedly the name of every plant she walked by. I could see in his eyes that he was not impressed. He turned away, taking a couple steps. I reached my hand out, grabbing his arm gently. He only turned his head slightly so that I could see his profile.

"I'll talk to him." I whispered, watching as he closed his eyes, nodding and then they were gone. I stared at the opening in the woods where they disappeared. The sun briefly crawling over the top of the tree line, a combination of mist and warmth hitting my face. I reached up with both hands, rubbing my temples at the headache I felt should be there.

I slowly turned around, hesitating before I opened the front door. I found Jake, now sitting propped up on the counter, practically swallowing an apple whole. He saw my expression and changed his own immediately.

"Jake" I sighed, folding my arms across my chest. "Jake, you can't..."

"Bella, Don't give me that." He mumbled, his mouth full of chewed apple. "You of all people should understand. You flew off to Italy for crying out loud. ITALY!" He shouted, throwing his arms up and he jumped down from the counter with a loud thud.

"Yeah! To save him!" I yelled back protectively. "Renesmee doesn't need to be saved. Edward and I will be there."

"Exactly." His voice dropped, along with his eyes. "but what about me. I'm losing two of the most important people in my life. Who's going to save me?" He crossed the room and sat at the table, almost sinking into the chair.

"Jake.." I whispered, suddenly overcome with emotion. I pulled out the chair next to him, sitting down.

"As much as I love you, Bella, you can't take her away from me. As silly as that sounds..." He paused to sigh. "I can't live without her." His fidgeting hands pressing down the seams of his pants repeatedly.

These words touched my unbeating heart, causing some sort of reaction, a tightening in my chest. I reached out, taking his warm hand in mine, gently squeezing.

"Oh Jacob." My voice quivered. "I know exactly how you feel. As much as you didn't like him, I knew there was no way I could live without him, even if I tried to for a while, it wouldn't have lasted."

"This is a little bit different." He said, his voice taking on a slightly harsh tone. "There is no moving on when you imprint.. No exceptions."

I released his hand, leaning back in my chair, thinking about the present situation. I listened to his uneven breathing. Watching his shoulders rise and fall with each breath. I hadn't noticed he had cut his hair. I tried to think back to when this happened. I couldn't remember. The entire house was quiet except for the old clock that hung above the fireplace, counting off the silent minutes.

He shifted suddenly in his seat, grasping my hand in his as he stared at me with desperate eyes.

"..behind." He said firmly, emphasizing each word.

"What about school?"

"They have schools in Alaska" He shrugged.

"What about Billy?"

"He has Rachel, and he understands."

"What about the pack?

"They have Sam."

"What about....Charlie?" The tightening pressing against my chest increased as I struggled to get out what I originally wanted to ask.

"What about Charlie?" He asked, confused.

"You're practically a son to him. You visit him daily. What if he gets lonely?" I watched his eyes crease as he slowly grinned.

"Charlie will get along just fine, he has Sue. He survived before us, and he'll survive after us." He said calmly. I watched his eyes wander, as if in thought. "I'll probably have to come home more often than I planned. Bella, he's going to be fine."

I let out the rest of the air I had been holding in my lungs as I slouched in my chair. I quickly went over the whole conversation in my head in a matter of seconds, wonder how it all changed. Five minutes ago I was set on telling him he had to stay in Forks and now I was practically ready to help him pack.

"I'll have to talk to Edward about this." I said, shaking my head

"3 against 1" He muttered under his breath.

"Whats that?" I asked, pulling from my own thoughts again.

"I said thanks." Jake said grinning as he practically jumped out of his chair, heading for the door. "See yah later Bells." He shouted halfway down the walkway, and then I was alone again.

I knew Edward wasn't going to be happy.


	4. Chapter 4

**I've been somewhat busy. Sorry this one is so short.  
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**And I don't own twilight, just my own imagination.  
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I grabbed a piece of newspaper, wrapping it around another glass and placed it into the box beside me. I was supposed to head over to the main house but with the conversation I just had with Jake, I didn't feel like it was something I wanted to get into in front of the whole family. I knew Alice would see everything slip away. I knew that Edward knew by this point. I finished packing a box of dishes and taped it up, pushing it to the side.

I replayed the earlier conversation over in my head, trying to figure out how to approach the subject with Edward. Every way I looked at it, he wouldn't be happy. The only thing I wanted was for my family to be safe and happy. Jake was definitely part of this family and Edward was going to have to come to terms with it. I sighed dramatically, reaching for the another box when I heard someone heading for the house on foot. It took me a second to realize it was Edward. Another second to realize that Renesmee wasn't with him.

He didn't say anything when he walked into the kitchen. He just stood there staring. I had thought of about 33 good reasons why Jake should come and the moment I saw him, all but two left my mind.

"Renesmee needs him" I said, watching his unchanging expression. I took a deep breath.

"I need him." I whispered feeling ashamed and guilty.

We had gotten over all of this. My feelings for Jacob. It was a topic we never really got into anymore now that Renesmee was around. Now that he wasn't constantly pressuring me to realize I still had choices. I had made my choice from the very beginning. What I didn't realize, was that my life was going to be full of choices. Choices that might hurt people. It was never going to stop. Edward stood in the doorway, arms crossed his chest. His eyes held mine and I couldn't look away. Several minutes had passed without a word as I sat on the floor in the kitchen. My hands, fidgeting in my lap.

"Say something, please" I said, figuring that talking about this was much better than uncomfortable silence.

He creased his forehead, eyes narrowing. I watched as he picked his words carefully.

"He's not staying with us."

I felt the knot in my stomach loosen. "Thank you." I mouthed silently. He pulled himself away from the door, crossing the room, and sat beside me on the floor, reaching for a stack of newspapers and started wrapping plates. We spent the rest of the morning on the floor in the kitchen in silence, packing for Alaska.

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**Reviews make me want to write more.**

**I'm just saying :P  
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